😳 [My Stories] If Only I Wasn't So Afraid...

WELL, WELL, WELL. A fresh new topic to get my weaknesses spread around the Internet? Getting my readers more depressed with my weekly posts? Well again, not really. I think this is more for the purpose of getting it out there that despite how I look around people, I'm actually really shy. Okay, so maybe shy isn't the right word I would use and I know my friends would rather rip their brains out of their heads than associate "shy" with me.

No, the problem with me is not that I'm just shy, but I'm sometimes a little frustrated by how much I hesitate to push away my fears, insecurities and the many "what-ifs" before making decisions and do something for myself. I get it, being a little cautious is not necessarily a bad thing but if that results in stopping me from getting what I want, then I need to rethink how I handle myself in these situations.

I realise that I have missed out on opportunities that could have been big for me. Things like voicing out my emotions when the time calls for it rather than keeping it stored inside. Things like making more effort to ask how my friends are doing and meeting up. Or even read through the ginormous amount of freshly bought books I never touched because I'm worried I'd read too much and time passes by when I have other things to do too.

You know, they're all just little things that if done right, I know I have spent my day well.

Here are some things I hope to tick off in the next one or two years:

1. Become a better listener and an even better composed person at giving advices.
2. Take my OWN advices as well.
3. If I'm not happy about something, SAY IT.
4. Avoid getting into toxic topics on social media just so that I can brag that I'm up-to-date with current news.
5. Eat healthier, exercise more. It's not embarrassing to sprawl on the floor, exhausted in my apartment and letting my housemates question my motives. 
6. Dress up and makeup the way I like.
7. Keep my plants healthy for the rest of the year.
8. Don't be afraid to be heard in a group of friends.
9. Believe that you're doing just fine. Just because things are tough, it doesn't mean you're failing. You're surviving.
10. To accept that despite my many insecurities and weaknesses, I have my strengths too.
11. And despite how I am, there are people who love my company.

Inspired by Wit & Delight